What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
10.06.2025 05:06
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
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¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
Make Nazis afraid again!
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Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
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At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
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Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
TEXT:
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In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Why have Indian girls almost stopped wearing sarees?
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
What was your first gay male experience?
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
How come Jesus died on Friday and rose on Sunday? That's not 3 days and three nights.
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
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And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.